Saruman’s Orcs and the Woods Next Door

It would appear Saruman’s Orcs have moved into the woods across the street from us. The only apparent difference is they are using chainsaws and bulldozers to take down trees, instead of the axes the Orcs used in the book and movie “The Lord of the Rings”.*

Cath and I have lived on our small farm in rural Fauquier County for the past 22 years. While only 20 acres, it’s our slice of heaven. Around us, most homes sit on 5-50 acre lots. It’s been that way for the entire time we’ve lived here. Across the street from our driveway, there’s a piece of land that is somewhere between 100-150 acres. It’s virtually all woods. It’s used by hunters in the fall and early winter. The rest of the time, it just sits there looking pretty.

When we first moved in, Cathy predicted we would have 20 years before development affected us. We are lucky we live in Fauquier County where the zoning laws are quite strict. Several decades ago, the decision was made to preserve Fauquier as a rural county, rather than going the way of development seen in Prince William, or eastern Loudoun County. Real “development” can only come near one of the existing towns and can’t just spring up in the woods. All of the rest of the property in the county has already been zoned for how many houses it can have on it, and so, as an example, we are not able to subdivide our 20 acre property. One of our friends has 50 acres, but can’t subdivide. Many properties, even as large as 100 acres, are only allowed to build two additional homes on the property (these “cut outs” were put in place decades ago, so the owner could have a couple of places his kids could build on).

The woods across the street from us were owned by a couple who lived about 20 miles away in Upperville. When the husband died, the wife still kept the property. A few years ago, she too passed away. There was a for sale sign on the property for a year or so, and we thought perhaps someone would buy the place to create an “estate”, or if lucky, maybe they would leave it as it was. The sign eventually disappeared.

Now we know. The property was originally zoned to allow ten houses and the folks who bought the property are building those ten houses. A few on 2 acres, a few on 5-10 acres, and a couple on 20+ acre lots. The foundation is laid for the first of those houses, on one of the smaller lots.

It looks like they aren’t clear cutting the woods, which is something we were afraid would happen. Still, they are chopping down the trees to build the houses and to put in a couple of roads. You can hear the saws and bulldozers all day long. They are busy little orcs. At least they are leaving a screen of trees along our road to mask the eventual houses.

Based on what is happening in other parts of the county, the assumption is many of the families moving in will be “City People”. They are in for a few surprises. Internet service is not great out here, and no where near what most people expect in towns and cities. Fiber optic cabling doesn’t exist in rural areas. Winters are … interesting. Will the newbies come with four wheel drive vehicles, or will it take them a year or two to learn that lesson? The property itself is hilly, and they may have trouble getting out of their little subdivision on a snowy day, not to mention traversing local roads to town before the plow comes through (and sometimes, even after the plow has gone through).

With the power outages we sometimes experience due to winter storms or high winds, I wonder how long it will take them to consider installing a generator. Since we are in the country and on a well, no power means no water.

Hopefully, they quickly learn composting isn’t a particularly good idea. Our local bear population loves nothing better than feasting on partially composted food, in between tearing down bird feeders. Also, there are the occasional guns going off from hunters, or neighbors just trying to squeeze in a bit of target practice.

They are destined to freak out when carpenter bees start munching on their houses or snakes appear, or the lady bugs invade their homes. And of course, they are in for the treat of stink bugs. They are everywhere and crawl in between the lining of curtains and anywhere else they can find to hide in and stay warm in the winter. When spring arrives, they are quite active in looking for ways to leave the house. If you step on them, or in any way disturb them, they emit the most horrible smell.

Cathy and I have never been NIMBY people (Not in my back yard), and knew this day was inevitable. Still, it’s a bit sad to watch it happen. I’m sure when all is said and done, we will welcome the new folk to the neighborhood. Secretly, we may chuckle a bit and can’t wait for them to experience the entirety of country living. Let’s hope they figure out how to exist in the country, respect this beautiful place, and not try and change everything to some version of city living.

We expect after they move in, the new folk will visit one of our local nurseries to buy some Mountain Laurel, Holly, Dogwoods or Redbuds to plant and beautify their new properties. It will be nice. They will replace the Mountain Laurel, Holly, Dogwoods and Redbuds recently cut down by the Orcs.

Addendum:

* If by chance you are not familiar with “The Lord of the Rings”, Orcs are evil creatures. In the second book of the trilogy, “The Two Towers”, we learn that at the behest of the wizard Saruman, Orcs are chopping down trees in an old forest to feed the fires of a furnace.

– Thanks to my wife Cathy for her help on this blog, particularly on the back half.