Joe Russo passed away about a year ago. I never met Joe, and didn’t know him, but I feel like I did, and I wish I had a chance to know him better. He was one of those people who cast a shadow bigger than they are.
He and his wife Pat, who is still alive and doing well, were the previous owners of our vacation house on Tilghman Island. MD. I’ve heard many stories of Joe around the neighborhood, and certainly feel his presence in our home.
Our house on Tilghman Island was originally built in the 1890s in a village called Fairbank, at the end of the island. It was a working village and by all accounts, most of the men were watermen. Over the years, the village changed but little, and that included the houses. Many of the houses started to show their age and the passing of time. Some were renovated, some weren’t. Ours was one the houses not renovated, or maybe not even repaired much. We talked to one of the watermen that previously lived in the house, and as a child, he could remember snow coming into his bedroom from a hole in the roof.
Pat and Joe bought this house around 1980. They were advised by some to tear it down and start over. It’s a funny thing about old houses – you either love them or hate them, and most folk don’t fall in the middle. Thank heaven, Joe and Pat loved this old house, and slowly renovated it. Pat gave us as a gift, a photo album that recorded their renovation, most of which they did themselves. You can see the love for the home (and each other) in their faces, and in their actions. They owned the place for about 30 years and made it into the place it is today.
When we first saw the house almost 5 years ago, we had been looking for a vacation home, but hadn’t found anything we liked. We gave up looking and went on a bike ride instead. During the ride, we passed this house and it drew us to it immediately. We made an appointment to see it the next morning, and put an offer in 4 hours later.
The day after we put the offer in, we drove back by the house and Pat was sitting on the front porch. We stopped and spoke with her, and she invited us onto the front porch. We spoke with her for quite awhile and wandered around the house again. Pat could not have been more gracious.
Since then, we’ve seen Pat one or two other times, and have ran into some of their children and grandchildren. They were happy to know we’d found the good luck messages they left us written on a wall in one of closets. And I see Joe, or the evidence of Joe around the house as I do my own repairs. Joe was a tinkerer and so as I update, or fix various things, I also get a chance to think about what was Joe thinking when he “installed this”. He had some smart ways (although not always conventional) of doing things, and I’ve learned to appreciate his methods.
I also see or hear Joe in the neighborhood. The kayaks someone bought from him; the motorboat (Rocky) that now belonged to another neighbor; the fig trees in neighbor’s yards (Joe was a fiend about figs…); the old crab pots out back; the Italian and US Flags in our sheds. And the stories I sometimes hear – “So then Joe…..”. In someways, he reminds me of my own father, who always had a presence larger than he actually was.
We’ve made this house into our home and we love it. We’ve had this place for 4 1/2 years now, and while I don’t particularly believe in ghosts, I think older houses keep a spirit of those who lived there before. I sometimes sense a presence – a creak, a sound, or a whiff of something. Whatever it is, it’s comforting.
I didn’t know Joe, but I feel like I did, and I wish I had a chance to know him better.
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Wow, what a beautiful story about my cousin Joe. He was one in a million and is sorely missed by all who knew him. You told so many things about him & his ways that made me think back on our family. I’m so thankful that I was born into it and have such loving cousins. Thank you for this.
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Thank you for your comments. I enjoyed writing the story – I do wish we could have met.
Max
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Thank you for sharing this! I laughed and cried as I read it. Especially the part “Joe was a tinkerer and so as I update, or fix various things, I also get a chance to think about what was Joe thinking when he “installed this”. He had some smart ways (although not always conventional)…”. I rented the cottage in the back yard of their Wildwood home from 1996-2000. Pat and Joe took me in as one of their own. One year I decided to rip out the bathroom of the cottage and do it myself. I watched enough DIY shows, why couldn’t I? Joe taught me how to hang dry wall… “Alright then I am going to hang one piece with you, then let me know when you are ready to spackle.” said Joe, and that’s how we worked. The best thing was, he was always one step ahead of me but never said a word. He was so patient. He let me learn from my mistakes but freely gave me his knowledge of “unconventional”! When I was ready to lay the ceramic 6×6 tile floor, he had all the pieces cut and measured for me so when I got home from work all I had to do was go! Joe taught me the correct way to eat crabs. I;’m from Pittsburgh originally, so I never really knew how good and how much fun it was. My heart hurts. So many good memories. So many stories told around that table on that back porch with a bushel of crabs. I wish I could have one more hug. I could go on and on, but thanks again!
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Barbara – thanks for sharing! A truly amazing man, I think.
Max
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Many a happy time we spent down at Tilghmann. We hope you enjoy it like we all did.
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That was beautiful, Max. Thank you. Yes, Dad’s effect on people was something that I admired and was fascinated by. Everybody loved him. I find your observations about his unconventional but smart ways of repairing or installing things accurate and amusing. One such example is the paint streaked plank supporting the ceiling fan in your kitchen. When he put it up we were still in the middle of the renovations and needed some circulation. He promised my mother, “It’s temporary, Pat.” Yet, according to my son, it is still there. Nobody else but my father could get away with that. I hope that we get to meet one day.
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Joe – thanks for sharing the story, and yes, the fan (and paint streaked board) are still here. The fan recently gave up the ghost, so we are talking about what to do to replace it….;-)
If you are down this way, stop by. It would be nice to meet you.
Max
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Thank you for sharing. I laughed and cried reading this easpecially when I read that he had smart ways of doing things (some not so conventional)… I lived in their cottage in Wildwood from 1996-2000. They took me in as one of their own. So welcoming, and Pat gives the best hugs! One year I decided that I would rip out the bathroom in the cottage myself. Why not? I watched enough DIY shows, why couldn’t I? Joe taught me how to hang dry wall, spackle, and lay ceramic tile floor. He was always one step ahead of me. He would have everything I needed right there and ready to go so when I got home from work I could just get started. They taught me how to eat crabs. Considering I’m from Pittsburgh I had no idea how much fun it was!
So many good memories. Way too many to continue on and my heart hurts. But thanks again for sharing. They are definately a special breed of people that you don’t find much in this world anymore.
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YOU SHINE MY FRIEND…..FOR PICKING UP ON THE DETAILS …THE SCENT…..THE LOVE AND JOY THAT THIS HOUSE HELD FOR THE RUSSO FAMILY. I TOO SHARED THIS JOY…….. I COMMEND YOU FOR YOUR COMMENTS.OX.JOE RUSSO FOREVER IN OUR HEARTS…..AND OF COURSE PATSY WHO HELD IT ALL TOGETHER!!!!!!
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Thank you for sharing your story about Mr. Russo. I rented his cottage out back in Wildwood from 1996-2000. Pat and Joe invited me into their family and they looked after me as if I were one of their own. They taught me how to eat crabs, considering I am originally from Pittsburgh I had no idea how fun and delicious it could be. Just sitting with them and listening to stories, man… My heart hurts. So many good memories. Good people.
I chuckled as I read the line “He had some smart ways (although not conventional)…” One year the shower in the apartment was leaking and I decided to take a stab at ripping out the bathroom myself. I watched DIY enough why couldn’t I? Joe taught me how to hang dry wall. He said “Alright now. I am going to hang one piece with you and then it’s up to you. Come get me when your ready to spackle.” And that’s how we worked together. Funny thing was, when I cut the power to the apartment to install the new lighting I didn’t realize I cut the power to their freezer too!! They were in Tilghman at the time. When they returned, Joe smelled this smell and discovered what happened and never said a word! I felt like a jerk!! But Joe and Pat never said a word. Thank you again!
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Beautiful story about a man, who at his funeral, there was a standing ovation that last forever. That was a first for me, show’s you exactly how loved and appreciated he was in this town of our’s. His wife Pat is just as beautiful as she can be, inside and out. They opened an Italian restaurant here in town, and our family would frequent it much, with up to 20+ people at the table sometimes, we have a big family. Also, going to school with his children, one in particular, Lisa, who carries her father’s tradition’s on, to this day. The weather has been crazy here, cold-hot-cold-hot, just last week there was a single fig on the tree, IN JANURARY! Just more signs from Mr. Russo to his beautiful wife , that he is still here with her. He was a very loved man in this town. God Blessed this family with a beautiful soul!
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Thank you for the comments and thank you for fig story – I think you are right…one more sign….;-)
Max
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I thank you Max! That is beautiful. I wish I had the words to tell you how much that means to me ( and I am sure the rest of my family). You would have like my father and I can guarantee he would’ve liked you too!
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Bianca – thank you. I appreciate it very much.
Max
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