I recently enjoyed a fun and funny New Yorker article, by Rachel Syme. While reading, I became aware of two dichotomies simultaneously – First, she is a wonderful writer, whose prose blows mine away. Second, I know how to cook a perfect soft boiled egg, while she does not :-).
I subscribe to the New Yorker, which has great writing on a multitude of topics. One of the features of my subscription is that I receive emails a couple of times a week with reading suggestions. Last week, the email shared several food related articles, and one of them immediately caught my eye. Maybe it was the lead in … “The Ridiculous Egg Machine That Changed My Breakfast Game – It breaks all my kitchen rules, and yet, every morning, I make myself a fussy little hotel breakfast.” I’m not a kitchen gadget guy, but this sounded intriguing. I knew I was either going to love it, or hate it.
Both Reads were Good, but Syme’s Article Caught my Eye First
The article WAS good, and interesting. I enjoyed the way she wove the story of the egg machine into her own background and family history, while adding something we all crave – a little pampering while at a hotel. She talked about short getaways, and the enjoyment of coffee in bed, and wonderful little breakfasts, including soft boiled eggs.
It made me think of my own introduction to soft boiled eggs. Growing up, eggs were a family staple, particularly on weekends. Saturday mornings often saw eggs scrambled, over easy or sunny-side up, with toast and bacon on the side. Hard boiled eggs? Sure. Always at Easter, but also occasionally for a snack, and a big dose of them in mom’s potato salad. Soft boiled eggs? I don’t remember mom (or dad) ever fixing them. I believe the first time I ever ate one was while stationed in Germany in the early ‘80s. On one weekend trip, we spent the night in a small village Gasthaus. The next morning we came to the dining room for breakfast, where we were greeted with charcuterie, a cheese board, and thick slices of bread, along with something else – soft boiled eggs in small holders, with a tiny comforter over the top of the eggs to keep them warm. The presentation was funny, practical and magical all at the same time. The eggs themselves? Both simple, and delicious. I was hooked.
Of course, we then had to make them at home, which led to us buying the little egg cups, and the tiny spoons needed to scoop out that golden delight from the center of the egg. We made them for a year or two, usually on the weekend when guests were staying the night. Then, as is often the case, we got out of the habit, and eventually stopped making them. For thirty years.
The Egg Cups Sat Unused for Thirty Years
After retiring about eight years ago, I rediscovered the egg cups, and brought them back into use. I’m usually up earlier than Cathy, so we eat breakfast separately. Once about every week or two, I take the four minutes and fifty seconds needed to make a soft boiled egg. Just. The. Way. I. Like. It. A little bit of memory, delight and tastiness all in one egg.
Four Minutes and Fifty Seconds to a Nice Breakfast
Which brings me back to Rachel Syme and her article. The twin dichotomies we share are perfectly summarized in her breakfast description in the article: “Mornings at home were for English muffins with a scoop of marmalade, or muesli with a splash of almond milk. Low-risk stuff. Foolproof … What I kept fantasizing about was a perfect plate of soft-boiled eggs, with a silky, spreadable yolk the consistency of honey. I knew I wasn’t going to be able to manifest this fantasy on my own. Enter the egg machine.”
In a million years, I would never come up with the phrase “…with a silky, spreadable yolk, the consistency of honey.” I mean, that is a perfect description. It makes me hungry just reading that line. And then, she adds the kicker “ I knew I wasn’t going to be able to manifest this fantasy on my own. Enter the egg machine.” I wanted to scream out “Rachel! You too can do this. All it takes is four minutes and fifty seconds! Really!”
So there you have it. We all have our talents, we all have our fantasies, and those of us who are lucky enough, recognize the limits of the former, while trying to reach the latter. If Rachel Syme can achieve breakfast nirvana with a DASH Rapid Egg Cooker, who am I to judge? In the meantime, I look forward to reading more of her wonderful writing, and maybe learning a thing or two along the way.
Addendum:
Rachel Syme is an American Journalist living in Brooklyn. She is a 2005 Stanford grad, and in addition to The New Yorker, has written for Rolling Stone, Elle, Salon, the New York Times, Esquire, GQ and The New Republic. If you want to learn more about her, or read some of her other prose, you can find it here: http://www.rachelsyme.com/
I do note there are lots of recipes for soft boiled eggs out there. They mostly differ based on how firm you want the yolk to be. My four minute fifty second recipe is from Joy of Cooking and produces a firm white, with a thick, but still liquid yolk. If you want a firmer yolk, go up to 6 or 6 1/2 minutes, which will provide a jammy yolk. After that? It’s on the way to becoming a hard boiled egg. A couple of similarities were in all of the recipes: slowly lower the egg directly into simmering water so it doesn’t crack, and the water should only be simmering, not a rolling boil.
Summer is almost here and schools will soon release their prisoners for the season. I envy the kids and their feelings of anticipation right now. Summertime, and the livin’ will be easy… Of course lots of the summer will be planned out, as seemingly everything is for children these days. Do they ever have the chance to just act like kids?
I was thinking back to summertime during my own youth and growing up in Tomahawk Terrace on the Southside of Ottawa, Illinois – population 18,000. There wasn’t much planning of our time at all, with every day it’s own adventure. Playground at the school? Playing Horse or two-on-two basketball at Schaefer’s or Cavanaugh’s house? Playing army in Varland’s nearby corn field or cow pasture? Hanging out and reading comics? … The possibilities were endless.
There were some organized activities in my life, such as Little League Baseball, or Boy Scout Camp, but most of the time? It was just us kids hanging out. You had to be home for lunch, and you had to be home for dinner. After that, I don’t really remember any other requirements.
… me in the mid 60s …
I think one of the best memories was playing “Work Up” baseball behind Honer’s house, next to the cemetery.
Work Up? What’s that you say? It’s the baseball game you play when you don’t have enough players for two teams, or maybe even one team. Hell, it’s the game the kids on the movie “Sandlot” would have been playing if the film had really gotten it right (and yes, I do love the movie).
The rules? Well there weren’t really any rules, but there were norms. Typically we’d have 7, 8 or 9 guys show up to play. You’d have 2 or 3 guys up to bat, with the remainder in the field. In our case, that included, in order of importance, a pitcher, 1st baseman, shortstop, 2nd baseman, and right and center fielders. We didn’t have a catcher, it was just whoever was up next to bat. The game was called Work Up because you would bat and run the bases until you made an out. Then the pitcher would go in to join the batters, the first basemen became the pitcher, and everyone else advanced one position. Whoever made the out moved to right field. Oh, and if you hit a fly ball and someone caught it, you did a direct exchange with that player.
The game was really adaptable. As an example, if you didn’t have enough kids, there might be only one outfielder, or maybe no 2nd baseman.
The only rules I really remember concerned Left Field. Our “ball diamond” had a graveyard where much of left field normally was. We never put a player in left field, although the center fielder might shade that way a bit. When you were at bat, if you hit a tombstone on the fly, it was an out – we basically assumed the gravestone “caught” the ball. If you hit a tombstone on the ground, we assumed the gravestone fielded a grounder and it was an automatic double. If you hit a ball and it didn’t touch any of the gravestones (almost impossible to do), then the ball was in play.
There are now trees near where Home plate, and 1st and 3rd Base were. Varland Park was a cow pasture at the time.
I don’t remember us ever having a set time for a game. Word just spread around and some number of guys would show up. We might play pickle, while waiting for enough folk to show. Most everybody was from the ‘Terrace, with the occasional friend or cousin added in. This included the Honer brothers, the Hinsons, Deaks, Hazelwoods, Steve Schaefer, John Levy, Chuck Ogden, Jim Habben, one of the Leach boys, Leonard Mayberry, Howard … other names I have long forgotten. If everyone showed up, we’d actually have enough for two teams and play pick-up, but that rarely happened. Kids ranged in age from a couple years older than me to a couple years younger, and there were lots of younger brothers in attendance. One unwritten rule was you didn’t try and take advantage of the younger kids. I mean, it was OK if one of your hits went towards them, but if you did it every time? Not so cool.
By the way, there was never an adult in sight. We seemed to manage just fine by ourselves, without their oversight or interference.
I don’t recall much about the games themselves, I just remember playing the game on hot summer days until we were tired. It might have been an hour, it might have gone on for three hours. Eventually someone’s mom would call and that player went home and then someone else would have to leave, and the game slowly broke up. We might reconvene again the next day, or maybe not until a week later.
I know it’s a different world today. Things are more complex, more challenging, and perhaps less safe. Kid’s lives, from what I can see as an outside observer and non-parent, are organized to the nth degree. Multiple activities, multiple practices, multiple study activities. I guess they are able to try more things, but I also think some things might get lost in the process, like the ability to entertain yourself, informal group interactions and how to handle them, and perhaps even learning a little about leadership for better or worse…
I dunno, do kids even want to spend time outside these days, or is it all mostly computer and video games? Back in the day, I know mom, or our babysitter, would have kicked us out of the house if we were hanging there too much.
I suppose some of this makes me sound like a grumpy old man after a fashion. I don’t really mean it that way. I just remember how much fun we had hanging out on our own behind Honer’s house, playing ball and trying like hell to not hit a fly ball to left field, where it was sure to be caught by a tombstone…
Addendum:
I went online to do a bit of research on “Work Up” baseball as a check on my memory. In a sign of the times, I found plenty of entries, most of them with long lists of rules on how to play Work Up… – sigh –
Thanks to Tomahawk Terrace alumni Bob Deak and Leonard Mayberry, for providing input to this blog.
It was Memorial Day Weekend, 1973. High School graduation was a couple of weeks away, when Howard, Funny, Hick, Bull, and I drove north to Wisconsin in search of Beer, Bass and Northern Pike. We would be more successful in finding one of those items than the other two.
I’m not sure who came up with the original thought, but with graduation from Ottawa High School (OHS) looming, the idea of a fishing trip to Wisconsin came up among a number of my friends. Sure we were interested in fishing, but we were also interested in drinking beer. At the time, the drinking age for beer and wine in Illinois was 19, while a mere two hours away in Wisconsin, it was 18. We decided to do it. Amazingly, our parents all agreed with the idea, (the fishing part, that is), and we were just about set. One of our number, my old friend June, actually had to work the whole weekend, and couldn’t make the trip. Another buddy, Jack, had to work on Friday, but would drive up on Saturday and meet us in The Promised Land.
A Photo of me, from the 1973 OHS Yearbook – Yea, we were Young
On the Friday of Memorial Day weekend, after skipping a half day of school, five of us set off for Wisconsin. The fishing party included Howard (Kim), Hick (Tim), Funny (Mark), Bull (Ed) and me. We piled into two cars, and drove north. The goal was to head to Lake Geneva, find a campground, find beer, and settle in for the weekend. When we reached the Lake Geneva area, a small bug crept into our plan – It was Memorial Day weekend and everybody and their brother was going camping and fishing in Wisconsin. As teenage boys, it didn’t occur to us to make reservations. There was nothing, and I mean nothing, available.
They say necessity is the mother of invention, and we decided to head west looking for a place to camp. Suddenly, near Delevan, Wisconsin our luck changed. On the side of the road, as if bathed in heavenly light, we came across Don’s Liquor Store. A sign in the window proclaimed “2 cases of Red, White and Blue for $5.85.” We had hit the mother lode! Now, for those who may not be aware, Red, White and Blue was Pabst Blue Ribbon’s lower level beer. You may be thinking to yourself right now “Hmmm, PBR is pretty low level itself. I didn’t know they had an even lower level beer.” Fortunately for us, they did. We didn’t care so much about the taste at the time, this was a matter of economics. Going into Don’s, we made our purchase, and loaded up the trunk of one of the cars with an enviable amount of beer. We then continued west, and that’s where the second bit of good luck hit.
We came across Turtle Lake, and as importantly, Schroeder’s Snug Harbor Inn. The Pabst sign out front drew us in like moths to a flame. It wasn’t fancy, and the lake wasn’t big, but camping sites were available right on the lake. Schroeder, the owner, registered us for three nights. We left the lodge, popped some beers and set up camp. This was going to be good.
The PBR Sign Drew us in, Like Moths to a Flame
Later, we explored the campground and their Lodge. Lodge is really toooooo grand of a title, but I don’t know what else to call it. There was a bar, a pool table, and they sold bait and snacks. A guy named Hank helped Schroeder at the Lodge and bar. The Inn was also affiliated somehow with the Turtle Lake Sportsman’s Club, but the relationship was murky. All in all, we were pretty happy.
A Turtle Lake Sportsman’s Club Patch from 1973
Back at our camp we made a fire and continued to drink beer. Suddenly one of our members came running up – “Guys! Guys! You aren’t going to believe this! Mr Murphy is here with his family and camping about a hundred yards a way!” What!!?!? Now, all of us knew Mr Murphy. He was a teacher at OHS. He’d coached Howard and I in wrestling, and I’d given his sons swimming lessons. More concerning was the fact that he was currently Howard’s homeroom teacher. Rut Roh…
Mr Murphy from the 1973 OHS Yearbook
What to do!? What to do!? We finally decided to take the bull by the horns and go say hello. We left our beers on the picnic table and wandered through the campground till we finally came to his tent. I believe he was as shocked to see us, as we were to see him. What are the odds we would both pick a minor campground in the middle of no-where for the weekend? Everyone shook hands and he introduced his wife and kids. I’m sure we reeked of beer, but he didn’t say anything. And to his credit, after that, we pretty much stayed in our part of the campground, and he stayed in his, preventing chance encounters. Still, we weren’t sure how to interpret this new omen…
Dinner that night was burgers and chips, and of course more beers. We drank around the fire well into the night, before eventually retiring.
The next morning arrived, and at least some of us went out early to fish in our canoe and rowboat. My recollection is that after a couple of hours, we came back in, skunked. No bass, no pike, no fish in general. Making our way to camp, we cooked up some breakfast and discussed the situation, but mostly just put it down to bad first day luck.
A couple of us went up to the lodge bar to have a beer, and Hank was working there. My buddy Hick recently recollected “I can see Hank behind the bar. I still smell his Lucky Strikes, and see the Brylcreem in his hair…” That’s as good of a description of Hank as any. We ordered our beers and were lamenting our poor morning showing to Hank when he suddenly said “You want fun? I’ll tell you what you do. Buy some of these wax worms we have for bait, and you’ll have more fun than a barrel full of assholes!” What? “Yep! More fun than a barrel full of assholes! You’ll catch plenty of brim and bluegill with them!”
Now I don’t know how much fun a “barrel full of assholes” would actually have, but we were hooked and bought some wax worms.
After we finished our beers, we headed back to camp. In the late afternoon, it was back in the boats to try our luck once again.
Someone caught a pike, but in general we were again having no luck and decided to switch to the wax worms – amazingly, we caught a number of brim, but most were too small to keep or cook. I don’t know if we met Hank’s definition of fun, but it made the late afternoon of fishing more enjoyable. The pike and a few brim become a part of dinner that night.
At Least a Few Fish Became Part of a Meal…
Eventually, we made it back to shore. Some of us worked our way to the lodge to shoot pool and have a beer or two. Jack, who had arrived too late to fish, joined us at the bar, where he impressively slapped a handful of bills on the bar like he’d been doing it his whole life. Never mind that we were still in high school.
While we were at the bar, Mr Murphy walked in to buy something in the store. We pretended our beers didn’t exist, and were making small talk with him, when Howard invited him to shoot a game of pool with us. He hesitated for a second, and then readily agreed. We decided to play two on two, with Howard and I against Mr Murphy and one of the other guys. As the game was about to start, Mr Murphy said “What do you say we make it interesting, and put a bet on the game?” We all readily agreed and were trying to decide what would make a good bet when Mr Murphy said “How about losers by the winners a beer?” Dead silence, and then an immediate and resounding “YES!” From all of us.
We played the game, and eventually Howard and I lost. And so it was, that Howard bought his high school homeroom teacher a beer, while still in high school. I don’t see that happening in today’s world.
After awhile, we went back to the campsite and started a fire. Unfortunately, later that night it started to rain, and rain, and rain some more. We moved to our tents when it turned to a deluge. At some point in time, we went to sleep, but the rain didn’t stop and continued all night long. By the early morning hours, our tents and everything in our tents, including us, was soaked through. It was almost as if Turtle Lake itself expanded, there was so much water.
The next morning we woke and went about making breakfast. Jack was already out in a boat by himself a bit off shore, and using the wax worms. Since he’d arrived so late the day before, he hadn’t yet been able to fish and went out early. He was getting a lot of bites, but the fish were so small, he wasn’t pulling any in.
The weather forecast was for rain all day long. As we ate a wet breakfast, a mutual decision was reached – it was time to head home after only two nights in Wisconsin. We packed our soggy belongings, along with our remaining beer and made the drive back to Ottawa. The great fishing expedition was over.
I did have one small problem. My mom worked at OHS as a secretary. What if Mr Murphy told her about seeing us, and our beer drinking? I decided to come clean and after unpacking, casually mentioned to mom and dad – “Did you know the drinking age in Wisconsin is only 18? We drank a couple of beers while fishing.” They didn’t really say much, and a few minutes later I added – “and it was amazing – we ran into Mr Murphy at the campground!” Mom shot me a look, but didn’t say anything. I never asked later whether he told her about seeing us and the game of pool.
The story didn’t quite end there…
Graduation came a couple of weeks later, and four weeks after that, I headed to West Point for summer training. The rest of the guys returned to Turtle Lake for another weekend of beer and fishing later that summer. When they arrived, they bought a beer at the bar and said hello to Schroeder. After a bit, someone inquired about Hank and rather irate, Schroeder immediately answered ““Hank?! You know Hank?! We don’t talk about Hank! Leaves a brown taste in your mouth!”
That was the last any of us ventured up north to Turtle Lake until 2021. 48 years after our fishing adventure, Mark, who now lives in Wisconsin, made a trip to see what, if anything still existed of the Snug Harbor Inn and the Turtle Lake Sportsman’s Club. The Snug Harbor Inn itself was still there with the PBR sign out front. He reported the lake was lower and smaller than we remembered and the lodge a bit bigger. Unfortunately, it was closed, either due to covid, or being off season and Mark couldn’t obtain any updated information on it, or the Sportsman’s Club.
Mark, and the Return to Turtle Lake in 2021
It’s almost fifty years since we made that trip to the wilds of Wisconsin and none of us live in Ottawa any longer. One of us has passed away, and the rest are scattered between Illinois, Wisconsin, Texas, Georgia and Virginia. In my mind, I can still see us drinking Red White and Blues by Turtle Lake on that first night, with not only the weekend, but our entire lives stretching out in front of us. It’s a pretty good memory, as memories go.
Addendum:
The Snug Harbor Inn is still at Turtle Lake. Looking online, it looks like they expanded some, and it’s nicer than I remember. They also opened a pub inside the lodge area and still have a pool table. I recently had a phone conversation with the current owner, and asked if he knew Schroeder or the Turtle Lake Sportsman’s Club. He said Schroeder was the owner of Snug Harbor about three owners before him. As to the Sportsman’s Club, he remembered hearing of it, but it no longer existed. He didn’t know what happened to it. You can link to Snug Harbor’s website here: https://snuglakeharbor.com/
Tom Murphy was always one of the good teachers at OHS and you could tell he cared about his students. In addition to serving as a teacher and coach, he later became Principal. My mom was a secretary in the front office, and they worked together there for several years.
Thanks as always to my friend Colleen for her editorial assistance. In a strange twist, Colleen knew about Turtle Lake from her youth, while living in Illinois. Her father was also at the Turtle Lake Sportsman’s Club! What are the odds?!
Thanks to Mark, Howard, Jack and Tim for contributing memories to this blog. Like the great 1950s Japanese movie, “Rashamon”, all of us have various “subjective, alternative and contradictory versions” of the trip to Turtle Lake. I’ve tied together my best recollection of the trip, along with information from the others as much as possible. I left out a couple of items to protect the innocent.
My good friend Mark Dunavan published a book “Almost an Eagle – The Roots and Escapades of a Midwestern Baby Boomer” in 2020 that tells the story of his life. The story of our trip to Turtle Lake is also recounted there, with some variations. This limited edition book is hard to find, but if you can get your hands on a copy, I highly recommend you do so.
It was May of 1943 in Bizerte, Tunisia. My Dad, then twenty year old Sergeant Willie I. Hall looked at the German soldier and said “Chicago”. The German answered “Chicago?” Dad stared back. “Chicago. Al Capone”. Now the German’s eyes’ widened …
… After the battle at Maknassy, Dad’s unit, the 60th Regimental Combat Team (RCT) reunited with the rest of the 9th Infantry Division. In late April of ‘43, the push was on to finish the war in North Africa, and in the words of the division Commander, Major General Eddy, “A world spotlight will be focused on us from the moment we attack until we have killed, captured, or driven every Axis soldier from Tunisia…”
The history books tell us that as a part of their assault, the 60th, attacked through the Sedjenane Forest and after driving the Germans out of the area, hit a bottleneck at Djebel Cheniti. On May 5th, the 1st Battalion of the 60th (Dad’s Battalion – about 500 men) attacked Hills 207 and 168 (see diagram below) and Djebel Cheniti by a direct assault with fixed bayonets. You read that right. Fixed Bayonets. In the words of the 9th Infantry Division Record, “One of the strongest positions in the final Axis defense was assaulted by one battalion of Infantry, with artillery blasting a shell-strewn pathway for its advance. Another story in the annals of foot soldiers, who do the dirty tasks of warfare”. After several hours, they took the hills and Cheniti.
I never heard dad say a word about the battle at Cheniti. Not one.*
1st Battalion, 60th RCT’s Path While Attacking Djebel Cheniti and then Bizerte
On the 8th of May, they arrived in Bizerte, and on May 9th, the Germans surrendered. The battle for North Africa was over. In the words of one soldier of the 60th, “We were all 20 pounds lighter and 20 years older.”
Soldiers of the 60th RCT in the Hills outside Bizerte, Tunisia on May 7, 1943.
At this point, I’m sure you are saying, “This is all great history Max, but what the hell does it have to do with your Dad and Al Capone?” Good question.
Now we come to the rest of the story.
With the collapse of Rommel’s Africa Corps, the allies captured prisoners. A lot of prisoners. Over 275,000 Axis prisoners were taken in all, including 25,000 in and around Bizerte alone. This included General Jürgen von Arnim, the German Supreme Commander.
There were, of course, no prisons, so in the immediate aftermath they confined the Germans in large “holding pens” with single strands of barbed wire around each of the pens. The 9th, along with other units, were then drafted into guarding the prisoners until more secure facilities could be established.
Prisoner Holding Pens Near Bizerte, Tunisia
Dad talked about guarding the Germans and the Italians. You have to remember just a few days or weeks before, they were in a kill or be killed mode with the enemy, with plenty of butchery to go around. All that separated the two sides now was a bit of barbed wire. According to Dad, the Italians never had much fight, and the captured Germans knew they were beat, so they generally behaved. Still, you needed to be careful.
During the days they were on duty, dad’s platoon always guarded the same area, and after a while, they would recognize certain prisoners, talk a bit back and forth, and maybe even pass a cigarette across the wire. At the same time, Dad said he wanted to make sure he looked tough so no one did anything stupid.
As Dad tells the story, he was talking with a few of the Germans one day and someone asked where he was from. He answered “Illinois”, but the Germans looked confused. So dad thought about it a bit, and then trying to look a bit tougher he said “Chicago”. The German answered “Chicago?” Dad stared back. “Chicago … Al Capone”. Now the German’s eyes widened. Everyone knew who Al Capone was.
The German looked at Dad and said with a smile “Al Capone…. Ratatatatat….” While making a machine gun like motion with his hands.
Dad looked back at the German, nodded his head, patted his M1 Garand Rifle and without smiling, said “Ja, Al Capone.” The German stopped smiling and didn’t say anything else.
Dad always told the Al Capone story with a chuckle. When getting to the punchline, he would draw himself up to look bigger and meaner. But he was deadly serious about the Germans not trying anything. After what they had been through, I don’t think it would have taken much for him to put a bullet in someone, for doing something stupid.
A little over two months later, after a bit of rest and relaxation, Dad and the 60th were back in Combat against the Germans on the Island of Sicily. There, he was wounded and almost died. You can find a link for that story in the Addendum below.
Dad at the WWII Memorial in 2008.
Addendum:
* Except for the story of how he was wounded, Dad never said much about any of the battles he was involved in. For the most part, he told funny stories about events during the war. I was shocked when doing some research for this blog to find he had been involved in a charge with fixed bayonets. As a soldier, you know things aren’t going to be pretty when you receive an order to fix bayonets. That is combat at its most up close and personal. I have to figure that after you’ve been given the command to fix bayonets, and then taken part in a bayonet charge, everything else in your life, maybe for the rest of your life, must seem pretty easy. It may explain a bit about why Dad always had such a good attitude throughout his life.
Al Capone – As everyone knows, after being the Crime Boss of Chicago for much of the Twenties, Al Capone was incarcerated for tax evasion in 1931. He was released from prison in 1939, but wouldn’t die until 1947. He had a worldwide reputation for murder and violence that may have been the equivalent of his actual deeds.
The sly glances, the casual banter, the innuendos, the back rubs… I think we all knew what was going on, but no one said it out loud. Let’s face it, Perry Mason was having an affair with Della Street, while Paul Drake, Hamilton Burger, and even super sleuth, LT Tragg, were all unaware.
Just another sly look between the two…
This past winter, Cathy and I discovered Perry Mason reruns on TV. We chuckled as we decided to watch the first episode, but soon became addicted. Nothing else on tonight? Let’s go watch a couple episodes of Perry.
Perry Mason was on the air from ‘57-‘66, and Raymond Burr won two Emmys. I have to say the show is great entertainment, although a couple of thoughts have crept into my brain while watching.
First, was there ever a more inept District Attorney than Hamilton Burger? Over the course of nine years, Perry won 268 out of 271 cases right off the bat, and while Burger didn’t handle all of them, he was the prosecutor for the vast majority. (Note that the actor who played Burger, William Talman, was fired from the show in 1960 for about six months after being arrested on charges of marijuana possession and lewd vagrancy. During that period, there were several different prosecutors. After the charges were later dismissed, he returned to the show). How could Hamilton Burger be so bad? He is ALWAYS on the wrong side. Even the cases he won were eventually overturned on appeal. Fred Thompson, as the DA on “Law and Order”, would have had no use for him… 😉
Don’t worry, Perry won during the appeal.
What really intrigues me is the relationship between Perry, and his Executive Assistant Della Street. I mean, hello, if these two aren’t having an affair, then nobody is. The sly, knowing looks, the continual side-by-side presence, the flirty banter back and forth… It all adds up. Plus, Della is ALWAYS there. Early morning in a diner with a client? Della’s right there with Perry sipping coffee. Midnight or 2AM in the office waiting on a call? There’s Della asleep on the couch. When Perry’s home sick with the flu, laying on his couch in pajamas, who brings him chicken soup? Della of course. Perry has a tough day at the office – who gives him a back rub? Della! And who’s walking off a vacation cruise ship with Perry to go help him solve a murder? I think you know the answer.
Who nurses Perry back to health? Why Della, of course!
We were discussing Perry and Della one evening with a friend when he exclaimed “I know! And you have that gorgeous Paul Drake right there! What is wrong with her? She’s definitely going after the older guy with the money!”
What about the “gorgeous” Paul Drake? He appears to be the ultimate catch. He drives a convertible sports car, wears sport coats or turtlenecks instead of the suits Perry is always in, has that rakish haircut, and is just hip in general. Not only was he an investigator, he acted as Perry’s tough guy, was an alleged ladies’ man, and the coolest dude on the show. And yet, he apparently has no personal life. Perry needs him in the middle of the night for a murder investigation? He’s there. Someone needed for a 24 hour stakeout? Paul’s your man. Here’s an interesting tidbit – Although he is a supposed “ladies’ man”, he never once hits on Della. Not once. If James Bond was always flirting with Miss Moneypenny, Paul, other than the occasional “Hello beautiful” to Della, was just the opposite. There was zero flirting. Was this in deference to Perry, or for some other unstated reason? We’ll never know.
Another of Paul’s evenings, about to be interrupted by Perry Mason.
We continue working our way through the episodes and are somewhere in season 5 by now. Perry continues his winning ways, Hamilton continues to snivel and lose, Paul continues looking cool, and Della? Della’s right there for Perry, anticipating his every need.
Addendum:
– This blog was written tongue in cheek, but it turns out that it is a common question among fans as to whether Perry and Della ever had an affair. The author of the Perry Mason books, Erle Stanley Gardner, wanted the answer to be, “No.” Believing that if Perry ever married Della “he would lose his sex appeal,” Gardner intended the nature of the relationship between the two to remain a mystery. In fact, he said that if they ever had a romance, he’d write about it. He never did.
Our second favorite restaurant in Rheindürkheim, Germany in the late ‘80s was Pfeffermühle (The Peppermill). Das Letzte Essen (The Last Meal) didn’t occur there, but that is where the story started.
Recently, Cath and I were thinking about Pfeffermühle. I’d made Cathy a special meal one night for dinner, Steak au Poirve (Steak with Pepper Sauce). As we were eating dinner, she said “Do you remember the couple we met at…”, before she could go on, I finished her thought “…at Pfeffermühle? The ones who came to dinner?” “That’s them!”, she answered. “Do you remember her saying “Dies ist das letzte Essen?”” (This is the last meal). We both started laughing…
Cathy and I About the Time of “The Last Meal”
Pfeffermühle was located just outside of Rheindürkheim, on Sommerdamm Strasse, the main road to Worms. It opened after we had already lived there for a year or so. Bruno, the owner, was from Italy and moved to Germany after spending several years in California. Although the restaurant was nondescript on the outside, once inside, the white tablecloths and napkins caught your attention.
The food made an even bigger impression. They served both pizzas and traditional Italian fare. Two great food memories that stay with me even today were their lasagna, and how good their pizzas were. One of the pizzas came with an over-easy egg in the center of it. Yea, I know it sounds strange, but it was really tasty. I’m not sure about now, but at the time, you always ate pizza with a knife and fork in Europe, so the egg was no problem.
Bruno worked the front of the restaurant, while his wife was the chef in the back. He was quite the host and spoke fluent Italian, English and German. He made everyone feel welcome when they arrived, and Pfeffermühle soon became popular. If you were there on a Friday or Saturday night, the place was always jammed.
We became regulars, and as is often the case, over time, would recognize other regulars. There weren’t really any Americans, but Germans came from several nearby towns, and we became friendly with a few couples we ran into regularly.
One evening it was turning late and only a few tables were still occupied. We recognized a couple sitting at a table near ours, and started talking with them. They invited us to their table for a nightcap, and that’s how we first met Gerhard and Hannah. We shared a drink or two, and everyone agreed we needed to get together some time in the future. With that, we all said good night and didn’t think any more about it.
Except…
We ran into them the next week, and then again two weeks later. That night, I bought the drinks. As the evening was ending, Gerhard invited us to dinner at their home in Osthofen a week later. We readily accepted.
The following Saturday, we drove the three kilometers to Osthofen, where we ate a wonderful meal. I don’t remember what we had, but I do remember he served French red wine with the meal. At the time, we didn’t know any Germans who did that, and it made an impression. The Germans make wonderful white wines, but their reds? There weren’t too many of them, and they weren’t that good at the time. Usually, you drank white wine or beer with dinner, no matter the meal.
Of course we wanted to return the favor, and invited them for dinner a couple of weeks later.
Cath and I stressed a bit about what to cook, as we wanted a nice meal. I don’t remember what we did for an appetizer, but we finally agreed the main course would be “Steak au Poirve” from a cookbook a friend had recently given us. It was a bit elegant. It was also the first time we would ever make it. For dessert, we would make a “Champaign Granita”.
Charollais is a Specific Kind of French Beef
The big night finally arrived and Gerhard and Hannah arrived at our home. We served some drinks and were bringing out appetizers when Hannah said “Dies ist das letzte Abendmahl”. What? Did we hear correctly? “This is the Last Supper”?** Was today some German religious holiday we were unaware of?
“Was hast du gesagt?” (“What did you say?”)
“Heute ist das letzte Abendmahl. Das letzte Essen.” (“Today is the Last Supper. The last meal.”)
Oh man, we must have screwed something up. Today must be some important holiday of which we were unaware. Either that, or she was going away somewhere and this was her last real meal. What were we going to do? And then she explained…
…The next day, she was starting a diet. Tonight’s dinner was her last meal before going on the diet…
Cathy and I started laughing, and they gave us a look. We then explained our lost in translation problem with “The Last Supper” and the religious connotations, and they started laughing as well.
The dinner went well, and the “Steak au Poirve” served with potatoes turned out to be a fine last meal before starting a diet. I followed Gerhard’s lead from the previous dinner and we drank some kind of red California Cab I’d bought at the military Class 6 store. The dessert wasn’t perfect, but we served it with Sekt (German sparkling wine) and no one seemed to mind. Over dinner, we all made a couple of jokes about the last supper, and whether this was worthy. Eventually, after coffee and schnapps at the end of the meal, they left and drove home.
Steak au Poirve
We saw them occasionally after that at Pfeffermühle and had a late evening drink with them a time or two. Perhaps six months later, we returned to the States and lost track of them. Pre-Internet, there was of course no exchange of email addresses or cell phone numbers.
This story is really about just a bit of nothing, but we still remembered the evening, and chuckled about The Last Supper, although it’s 44 years later. Even small old memories can be good for the soul, especially when they come out of no where.
Addendum:
** – For those who may not be aware, TheLast Supper is the final meal that Jesus shared with his apostles before his crucifixion. It became the basis for the holy communion. In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus prays thanks for bread, divides it, and hands the pieces of bread to his disciples, saying “Take, eat, this is my body.” Later in the meal Jesus takes a cup of wine, offers another prayer, and gives it to those present, saying “Drink from it, all of you; for this is my blood of the covenant, which is poured out for many for the forgiveness of sins.” It is immortalized in DaVinci’s famous painting. Our dinner wasn’t anywhere near Easter, but the Germans have A LOT of religious holidays, which is why we thought we may have been unaware of some other holiday.
Crazy Ivan* anyone? Another Submarine story from my buddy, Bob Bishop**… It was mid-September, 1970. Our submarine, the USS Finback, had been commissioned way back in February, but we were still doing a number of exercises and independent operations to get additional sea time under our belt. On this particular exercise, we were to provide “services” to anti-submarine warfare (ASW) configured Navy patrol aircraft, to give them an idea of how to use their ASW gear and try to find a real live nuclear submarine. This exercise was to involve every ASW patrol plane on the US east coast, NATO members in western Europe, and one reserve squadron from Chicago (don’t ask me why there is an ASW squadron in Chicago).
The USS Finback (SSN 670)
In the Atlantic Ocean, that meant a complex organizational challenge for a lot of people. For each exercise, using radar and radio communications, we would vector a Navy Lockheed P-2 Neptune or P-3 Orion aircraft on top of our location so they could mark where we were. We would then submerge and maneuver. If they didn’t find us in 50 minutes (marking our location by dropping a transmitting sonar buoy), we would broach or surface, show them where we were, and they would then clear the area for the next plane to arrive at the top of the hour. We did this for 18-20 hours a day most days, for 4½ weeks.
During the exercise, we also did occasional helo transfers of a CO/XO from an aircraft squadron to our ship, so they could get a sense of what it was like to be on a submarine and how we operated during these exercises. I particularly remember one squadron XO, a Commander (I was a lowly Lieutenant, but was pretty comfortable with what I knew and no longer frightened by a senior officer), who came in the Control Room after midnight one night. I was the Officer of the Deck (OOD) – the officer on duty responsible for driving the ship, responding to emergencies and so on, unless the Commanding Officer came on deck to relieve me. I had the 0000 to 0600 watch and we were in the middle of conducting the ASW exercises.
We talked over a number of things he was curious about, and he watched as I/we went through a couple of the exercise cycles. Chatting after the third one, he observed “I think I understand your plan. You alternate going to port or starboard as soon as you submerge.” I responded, “Well, not actually”, and we walked over to the chart table. A piece of paper was taped on top of the glass top of the chart table. A mechanical device under the glass receives inputs of the ship’s speed and direction and moves a little light accordingly. Every minute the quartermaster puts a pencil dot where the “bug” (the light) was. As a result, you could see where the ship had been.
I quickly explained how “the bug” worked and showed him where we started the last run and where we ended up 50 minutes later. I then explained that the Captain gave the OOD the latitude to do whatever he wanted, so I decided to spell the Helmsman’s (the person actually steering the ship) name in cursive each watch. I think the letter I was on for that particular run was a “b.” The Lt Commander looked at me, aghast. “You mean, you don’t have a pattern, a routine?” “Nope,” I said, “It all depends on when I am on watch and who the Helmsman is. Although sometimes I use the name of the Stern Planesman or the Diving Officer.”
He walked quietly away, mumbling to himself.
During the 4 1/2 weeks of the exercise, not a single plane ever found us, even though they knew where we started each time. A discussion about the capabilities of ASW aircraft is a subject for another day, but I’ll leave it at this – ASW aircraft (including helicopters) vs. a US Navy nuclear submarine? Bet on the submarine, every time.
Bob in 1964, and then about 50 years later
Addendum:
– * Crazy Ivan references a maneuver sometimes performed by Russian submarines, and made famous in the movie. The Hunt For Red October.
⁃ ** My friend Bob Bishop graduated from the United States Naval Academy in 1964 and had several tours on Nuclear Submarines during the Cold War. At the time, Admiral Hyman G. Rickover, the founder of the modern nuclear Navy, personally interviewed and approved or denied every prospective officer being considered for a nuclear ship. The selection rate was not very high.
– This story is pretty much all Bob’s. All I did was add some editing assistance and publish it.
⁃ The USS Finback (SSN-670) was a nuclear-powered fast attack submarine. Bob was a “plankowner” – a member of the initial crew. He was the third officer to report on board.
⁃ You can read another of Bob’s submarine adventures here. It’s a compelling Cold War story. The movie, The Hunt for Red October, is child’s play, compared to what these sailors did on a daily basis. …The Comms Officer ran in and handed the CO the decoded message. The CO read the message, took the lanyard from his neck, unlocked the firing key cabinet, and reached in for the firing key. We were about to […] Continue at: https://mnhallblog.wordpress.com/2021/06/23/we-knew-we-were-at-war/
The Black Death. That’s what we called it. Among us Plebes at West Point, feelings were strong, and universal. To this day, grown men shudder when they see a picture of The Black Death. How could a single book leave such a strong impression? What devilry was this? What book of spells could cause such consternation?
Yes, Grown Men Still Shudder when they See a Photo of The Black Death
Of course it wasn’t just any book. This book was “Modern Calculus With Analytic Geometry (Volume 1)” by A.W. Goodman. We never called it that though. We called it The Black Death, or sometimes The Black Plague. The book was black, but I suppose our title referred to the entire experience of Plebe (Freshman) math at West Point as much as anything.
The Black Death, in all it’s Glory
After Beast Barracks our first summer at West Point, it was a relief to get to the academic year. Unfortunately, we didn’t quite know was waiting for us. In addition to the normal Plebe challenges, Calculus was a required course for all, and provided our introduction to The Black Death.
This wasn’t just any old math course. There were several “attributes” that put the class into the category of those things you never forget. My classmates and I laugh about it now, but it’s still a bit of a nervous laugh.
First off, the class of ‘78 went to Plebe math five days a week, including Saturdays, with 90 minutes for each class. Prior classes attended Calculus class six days a week for 75 minutes per class and thought ‘78 was getting over, since it was only five days a week ;-).
In the class itself, we had normal homework, quizzes and tests. In addition, we suffered a unique form of torture called “The Boards”, also known as “Recitations”. A couple of days a week, the professor would call out “Take Boards.” We cadets stood up and each of us went to one of the blackboards that covered the walls in the classroom. The professor then asked us to work through a calculus problem on the board. It might have been one of the previous night’s homework problems, or it might have been the proof of some theorem. After several minutes, he called “Cease Work!” and then called on one of the students to walk through, or recite, their problem solution. Sometimes it was a cadet who had the solution mapped out perfectly. Other times? Well, other times it might be a cadet whose answer wasn’t correct. It could make for some tense/fumbling moments. Recitations had taken place at the Academy since at least 1869.
Somethings Never Change – Cadets “Taking Boards” in 1900
Of course that sly b@stard Goodman contributed to our pain. While there were often theorems in the book that provided the mathematical proof for the result, it wasn’t always the case. If there was ever a theorem in the book where it said “The proof is intuitively obvious to the casual observer”, you knew it would be a problem for the boards, or a quiz, or a test. For most of us, the solution was never “intuitively obvious”.
At the time, West Point was on a 3.0 grading scale. 3.0 was a perfect score. 2.0 was the lowest passing grade. If you scored a 2.5 on a quiz, you built up five “tenths”. If you scored a 1.7 on a quiz, that was the equivalent of an F and you were down three “tenths”. For those near the bottom of the class in math (or any course), the phrase “2.0 (pronounced “Two OH”) and go” became common. Basically it meant over the course of the semester (and year) you needed to finish with a 2.0 average. Any tenths over that were wasted.
We were quizzed and tested on a regular basis and over time, each of us fell somewhere on the spectrum between 3.0 and less than 2.0. Every few weeks, the math department reordered us cadets by current math class grade ranking. That is, those with the highest grade average, migrated to the “top” sections, while those with the lowest scores would migrate to the “bottom” sections. Each section had about 15 or 17 students. The theory was those in the top sections could cover more material, while those in the lower sections could receive the extra help needed. This reordering of the class on a regular basis was first implemented in the 1820s and was unencumbered by progress for the next 160 years.
The lowest section also earned the nickname “the ejection section” and the guy with the very lowest grade was in the ejection seat. My classmate Rick Steinke, was in the ejection section and ejection seat at various times. At the end of the semester and year, some number of cadets weren’t going to have a grade over 2.0 and one of three things would happen. Rick’s recollection – “That is where I was at the end of first semester, plebe year. Of the bottom 30, as I recall: 1/3 of us did not make it to the next semester (they were booted from the academy); another 1/3 were turned back a year; and another 1/3 went to summer school. I believe I was the only plebe who escaped unscathed, with just a couple of tenths to spare. Thanks to Captain Art Bonifas*, my first semester Professor, and Major Bachman my second semester P, I made it through. Also, Marty Vozzo, my roommate (and several years later, a math professor back at West Point), told me which theorems and equations I needed to memorize. Divine intervention, my brother.”
Rick DID survive the Ejection Section, and the Ejection Seat
Time passed, and we moved on. Obviously lots of Plebes did quite well in Calculus. Many excelled at it.
My classmate Joe Spenneberg, returned to teach math at West Point a decade later, from ‘88-‘91. By the time he returned, Goodman was gone, as were The Boards. The cadets still attended math five days a week, but only for an hour at a time. Also, classes were no longer “reordered” on a regular basis. The course work changed some as well – instruction started with “discrete math”, before migrating to integrals and “continuous math”. In Joe’s words, “The jump between discrete and continuous was key. We told them to imagine that the discrete step is infinitesimally small, which introduces the concept of the limit which is essential to being able to define a derivative …” as Joe was recently explaining this to me, I fogged over about then ;-).
Joe also told me a total of nine or ten of our classmates DID return and teach math at West Point. To the best of my knowledge, as a class we never ostracized them.
I’m sure Mr. Adolph Winkler Goodman, who died in 1989, had no idea about his effect on Plebes at West Point. I don’t think it mattered if you were a star man (top 5% of the class) or a goat (bottom of the class), everyone called it The Black Death. Yea, we laugh about it now, but it was pretty serious stuff then. Looking back, it was one of those commonalities that united all of us. You don’t think about a math class uniting people, but I sure think The Black Death did so for us. The only other class with a similar effect was boxing, but that’s another story for another time.
As I was working on this blog last week, I had a dream one night. I was back at West Point, and you guessed it, in math class. It was finals and I was in the classroom with several classmates. Time was passing and for some reason, while I had a copy of the test, I couldn’t find my paper to write my answers down. I knew the answers, but I couldn’t find the piece of paper to write them on. Classmates started finishing the test and leaving the classroom AND I still hadn’t started. I was trying to ask the teacher for help, and getting no response…
I woke up in a sweat. Looking around, I was in my own bed, with Cathy sound asleep next to me. I settled back to sleep and chalked it up to one last gift from Mr Goodman and The Black Death.
Addendum:
⁃ * The name Captain Art Bonifas might sound familiar to you. After leaving West Point, Captain Bonifas was stationed in Korea. In what came to be known as “The Korean Axe Murder incident ”, Bonifas was bludgeoned to death by North Korean soldiers in an international border incident in August of 1976. The world was pretty tense for a couple of weeks after his death. You can learn more about the incident here: https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Korean_axe_murder_incident
⁃ Special thanks to classmates Rick Steinke, Joe Spenneberg and David Fitzpatrick, who contributed both content and editing to this blog. All three were involved in teaching and Higher Education after their time at West Point. Rick is a former Harvard National Security Fellow, and later served as the Associate Dean at the George C. Marshall European Center for Security Studies. Joe and David both returned to teach at the Academy, and Dave continues to teach History at Washtenaw Community College in Ann Arbor, MI.
⁃ For some additional history about West Point and Math, you can try this article – Mathematics Education at West Point: The First Hundred Years: https://www.maa.org/book/export/html/116851. Founded in 1802, West Point was the first engineering school in the United States, and had a uniquely technical curriculum for its time. The first two years of the curriculum was dominated by mathematics. The information in this blog on the history of “Taking Boards”, and the reordering of the class on a regular basis were both documented in this article.
I’m no Doctor Dolittle, but I do “Talk to the Animals” here at Rohan Farm, and do so on a pretty regular basis. Most mornings, we have conversations, although they tend to be a trifle one sided, at least in a verbal sense. Still, I think we have a pretty good understanding of each other.
It starts when I wake up in the morning. Carmen, our dog, will stir and I’ll ask her if she had a good night sleep. She doesn’t answer, and instead does a couple of “downward dog” yoga stretches while waking up and looking at me. Eventually, we are both awake and go downstairs and out the door.
At the barn, I greet our horses, Katy and Stella, with a good morning, and ask them if they had a restful night, and whether there were any visitors to the barn. They tend to just look at me, and the look says “Where were you? It’s time for our breakfast!” On cold mornings, when there’s some ice in their buckets, I’ll also ask if they were warm enough during the night. Of course they were, but it seems a friendly thing to ask. While getting their food, I keep a bit of chatter going about the beautiful sunrise outside the barn, or the new snow on the ground, and aren’t they going to be surprised when they are turned out. They respond by stomping their hooves, or scraping the bars on the stall doors with their teeth, wanting to know where the hell breakfast is. Eventually, I give it to them, and things quiet down, while they munch away.
Katie and Stella – “Where’s my breakfast!?”
Now, it’s time to feed our cats, Stan and Ollie, and I again greet them with a hello and ask how their night was. Lately, it’s been fairly cold, so we’ve allowed them to sleep in the heated tack room, rather than the barn itself. They purr and wrap around my legs, or rub up against Carmen as they wait for breakfast. I’ll ask them if they heard Momma Cat out in the barn last night. Momma is a cat whose owner moved away, and we have seemingly adopted. Cathy frequently sees her, but she is quite shy around Carmen and me and we rarely do. As I leave the barn, I call out a loud hello to Momma Cat, and noisily put some food in a bowl in the hay area for her. Of course, she is nowhere to be seen.
Carmen and I then return to the house for our own breakfasts. As we enter the mudroom, Carmen immediately sits in front of her dog bowl. She hasn’t barked, or said anything verbally, but she might as well have said “OK – you fed everyone else, now it’s my turn. And don’t even think about making your coffee before feeding me.”
Tail wagging, Carmen’s ready to eat…
After a couple cups of coffee and small breakfast, it’s time to go back to the barn and let everyone out.
The cats go first, and I remind them to come back at dinner time, if they want to sleep in the tack room. Otherwise, they are on their own. I tell Stan to watch out for our other neighbor’s un-neutered male cat that sometimes comes slinking around the barn looking for a handout. Stan and he have a history, so I figure a word of caution can’t hurt. I also remind Stan doing a walk-about for a week or more in winter is probably not a smart thing to do, but he ignores me whenever I tell him this.
Ollie and Stan after breakfast on a recent morning
Finally, it’s time to put the horses out and I take a few flakes of hay to the nearby paddock. While in the hay area, I note that Momma Cat has already eaten most of her food, and disappeared back into the hay. I say hello again, and call “Here kitty, kitty, kitty…” a few times, but get no response
As i put Katy’s grazing muzzle on, I tell her I’m sorry she has to wear it, however, it’s for her own good, and as a pony, we don’t want her developing health issues from overeating. After taking her out, I return for Stella, who has waited patiently. Leading her to the paddock, I usually just tell her to enjoy the day, and remind her not to pick on Katy.
Katie (in the grazing muzzle) and Stella
With that, it’s back to the house, and the rest of my day.
The thing is, I think Dr Dolittle had it slightly wrong when he said “Oh, if I could talk to the animals, just imagine it …” Talking “to” the Animals is easy. I mean, I do it every morning. It’s talking “with” the animals that is harder. While “Talking to” and “Talking with” are often used interchangeably, they aren’t quite the same, are they? “Talking with” implies a conversation between two or more. “Talking to” can imply a one way, or one sided conversation, or perhaps even a lecture.
I guess it’s not that different from people in that regard. Talking to people is easy. Talking with people is what’s hard, and these days, with the fences everyone puts up, getting harder. We all know people that are great talking to, or at you, but maybe aren’t so good at the listening and understanding part.
Upon further consideration, I think it is easier to communicate with the animals. I may do most of the verbal talking, but the interchange and understanding that goes back and forth is pretty good, at least in comparison to some people I know.
Addendum:
⁃ While I do the morning feeding at the barn, I would be remiss if I didn’t mention Cathy does 90% of the animal care on the farm. Afternoon feedings, stall cleanings, horse healthcare and a myriad of other horse and animal maintenance chores are all under Cath’s purview. While I can’t say whether she talks more or less than I do with them, her understanding of their wants and needs is infinitely greater than mine.
⁃ Carmen is the smartest dog we’ve ever had and a GREAT communicator. Here’s a blog she wrote about a year ago: My name is Carmen. I’m about 44 years old now, and in my prime. Some guy named Shakespeare once said every “dog will have his day.” I think every day is my day, and I […] Continue at: https://mnhallblog.wordpress.com/2021/04/07/whosagooddog-carmen/
A Day in the Life. (Or, How I spent Fourteen Hours I Will Never Get Back.)
Ever think about the things you do, in order to do the things you want to do? After a wonderful vacation in California over New Years, payback, in the form of a long as hell travel day, happened on the return trip to DC. I freely admit this might be a boring blog, but something compelled me to write it.
The day started around 5:30AM with a wake up alarm. I didn’t fall out of bed, or drag a comb across my head, but I did find my way downstairs and drink a cup (of coffee). I finished packing and then loaded the luggage into Bonnie’s car. I grabbed my day bag and jacket, and climbed in the backseat, leaving the front seat for Cath. By 6:15AM, we were on the road.
Anderson Valley looks a bit different when it’s still pitch black. You don’t see the vineyards, wineries or scenic hills. Instead, all of our eyes were glued to the road ahead, following the twists and turns. There was also a slight fog reducing visibility. The hilly, winding trip out of the Valley to Highway 101 usually takes 45 minutes, but with the darkness and fog, it was 7:15 before we made the highway.
Bonnie had a 9:00AM appointment in Marin County that morning, so she was happy we were along, allowing her to take the HOV lane. In any case, she was a good driver, or we were lucky and traffic was light, or both. We made the Larkspur bus terminal for the Marin AirPorter about 8:35. Hugs and “I love you”sall around, and then Bonnie departed for her appointment. We had the joy of sitting, masked, in a small terminal by ourselves for 40 minutes. In fact, we would be masked for most of the next ten hours.
Masks, masks, everywhere a mask
The AirPorter bus runs directly from Marin County to the San Francisco Airport (SFO). At 9:15AM the bus arrived right on time, and at 9:20 we pulled out. The bus was about 1/3 full, and everyone was masked (required). Traffic remained relatively light, and I’ll be d@mned, we pulled into the United Terminal at SFO right on schedule at 10:30AM. Outside the bus, we took our masks off briefly while collecting our luggage. Then, masks back on, we entered the terminal.
The Marin AirPorter is actually a good way to travel
With Covid going on, United recommends people arrive three hours early at the airport, due to security concerns, longer check in times, and general complications with masking and so on. I figured two hours was enough time, but you never know. Arriving at 10:30, there were two hours and forty five minutes till our flight. Plenty of time. Almost tooooo much time.
Although we already had our electronic boarding passes, we still needed to check one bag. Baggage “self check” was something of a cluster, but 15 minutes later, the bag was gone and we were walking to security.
At security, no one was in line! The checking of tickets and IDs went quickly, but there was a back-up at the final Security screening point. Only one line was open, and it appeared either the gear was malfunctioning, or a new crew was working the line. We just stood in place for several minutes, with no one advancing. Eventually, there was some movement, we were X-rayed, and finally on our way to the gate around 11:15AM. We hadn’t eaten anything yet, and stopped at the first restaurant we came to.
Miraculously, two seats were open at the bar and we grabbed them. A plexiglass divider separated us from the kitchen crew and waitstaff, along with little plexiglass dividers for every couple of barstools. The waitress slid us menus under the plexiglass, we removed our masks and took a look. It was the airport after all, so nothing was cheap, and you knew it wasn’t going to be great. Still, at $17.25 the Yankee Breakfast (bacon and eggs, hash browns, and toast) was a better deal than the bagel and lox at $19.50, so we both became Yankees for the morning. And since it was the last day of vacation, what the hell, we ordered Bloody Marys as well. At $12.50 each, they were practically a bargain. The Bloodies tasted pretty good, and the breakfast itself wasn’t half bad – for an airport, it was actually pretty good. We contemplated a second Bloody Mary, vetoed the idea, and asked for the check. $66, plus $15 tip later, we remasked, and resumed our walk to the gate.
A brief (and expensive) stop at the airport restaurant
It was now about 12:30PM. Fifteen minutes later, they started boarding the plane. For some unknown reason, we had a small bit of luck and had been moved from boarding group 4 to boarding group 2. We boarded early, and settled in for the flight to DC.
Waiting for takeoff…
The plane took off only about fifteen minutes late and the pilot was pretty confident we would make the time up somewhere over the Midwest. I stayed masked for the entire flight, except when sipping on a club soda. Everyone else on the plane stayed masked as well, and no crazies were yelling at the flight attendants about their rights. I did some reading, some writing, but no ‘rithmetic, and then watched Matt Damon in “Stillwater” (which I recommend, if you haven’t seen it). A bit more writing, and we were finally descending. It turns out the pilot was right, and we landed about 8:45PM, 15 minutes early. Amazing!
Let’s all crowd together to get off the plane!
We walked to baggage claim, where a large, crowded mob was waiting for their luggage. All were masked, but there was zero distancing. One guy actually knocked me out of the way, with no “excuse me” or any other words, to retrieve his bag. Then it turned out it wasn’t his bag, and he knocked a couple more people out of the way putting the bag back on the conveyer belt. The serenity prayer* briefly flashed through my brain. Eventually, our bags arrived. We gathered them up, and proceeded to Section A of Parking Garage 1 and our Subaru. Once outside, and in the garage, masks came off.
The drive home was pretty easy, even though a raging snow storm occurred the day before. Major highways were clear, but the local roads, although plowed, still had some snow and slickness to them. We arrived at the Farm at about 10:40PM, approximately fourteen hours after we woke up in Philo that morning. Carmen, our dog, greeted us with a wagging tail, and little yelps of pleasure. We stayed up another hour to relax a bit, and finally went to bed around midnight.
Here’s the thing. It was a looooong day, but it wasn’t a bad day. That is, no bad things happened. The bus arrived on time and didn’t break down on the way to the airport. Our flight wasn’t one of the 20,000 flights that have been cancelled since Christmas Eve. Since we were on a direct flight, we didn’t miss some connection at O’Hare airport in Chicago due to weather. Our flight arrived arrived on Tuesday, January 4th, the day after some people were trapped in their cars for over 26 hours in the DC area, due to a snowstorm. Despite Omicron racing around America, we didn’t catch Covid.
No, it wasn’t a bad day. Still, it was fourteen hours, approximately ten of them masked, we’ll never get back. The trip to California at the start of vacation was of similar duration. It too happened flawlessly. So the price of a wonderful ten day vacation in California? In addition to the dollar cost for the plane and bus tickets, two of those ten days were consumed entirely by travel. In the big scheme of things, a pretty cheap price to see loved ones.
Addendum:
– Yes, Planes, Buses and Automobiles is a play on the John Candy/Steve Martin movie “Planes, Trains and Automobiles”.
– And yes, the opening title, “A Day in the Life” and the line “I didn’t fall out of bed, or drag a comb across my head, but I did find my way downstairs and drink a cup” were inspired by the Beatles song, “A Day in the Life”.
* The Serenity Prayer is a prayer written by theologian Reinhold Niebuhr. It is usually quoted as: “God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, courage to change the things I can, and wisdom to know the difference.”
Live Life Exuberantly 