Month: January 2024

January

January

I may not hate January, but I don’t exactly love it. After the fun and festivities of Thanksgiving, the Christmas holiday season, and New Year’s Eve, January arrives like a fat dose of reality, cold and hard. When I was at West Point, it was the start of what we called “Gloom Period”*.

The weather, reduced daylight, post-holiday debt, broken resolutions, and springtime nowhere in sight all combine, making January a demanding month. Additionally, living on a farm in the country makes January more “real”, or at least more of a challenge than living in the city or the ‘burbs. All of the daily chores go slower, or take longer to do. It’s just a fact of life here on the farm.

There are of course good things about January – a couple of holidays; the fresh start of a new year; skiing, sledding or skating if you are into those and nature collaborates; all of those wonderful soups, stews and casseroles we make and eat in winter; seeing a bright red cardinal framed against the white of the snow; sitting by a fire, while looking out a window at the beauty of the falling snow…

Beauty of the New Fallen Snow.

Looking out a window at the beauty of the falling snow… and knowing I had to get my butt out there ASAP and plow the drive from the barn to the house to the road. This year, after over 700 days of no measurable snow in the Virginia Piedmont, Mother Nature reminded us she is boss. This January, two storms gave us 10 inches of snow and I plowed after each of them. I also plowed an elderly neighbor’s driveway so she could get up and down the hill at her home.

Plowing the Drive From the Barn to the House to the Road.

After the snow, the temperature dropped into the low teens and single digits. This meant placing an extra space heater in the barn tack room to keep the pipes from freezing. We also moved the barn cats into the tack room at night to keep them from freezing. Extra hay was provided for the horses, as well as giving them a fresh bucket of unfrozen water just before bed each night.

Trying to Keep Both Pipes and Cats Protected.

The state and county plowed the roads and then plowed them again. With high winds, the dry snow drifted back over a couple of our country byways, making them nearly impassable. Additionally, a couple of friends ended up with frozen pipes. The pretty white snow wasn’t quite so pretty by then.

Of course I realize compared to friends and family in the midwest, this weather has practically been balmy and the snowfall not so bad. Maybe I’ve grown soft over the years away from home.

This being Virginia, you can count on frequent weather changes, which did happen last week. The snow, ice and freezing temperatures gave way to a day of misting rain and then temperatures first in the 60s, and then the mid 70s the next day. The snow disappeared and the ground turned to mud. This week as the month is ending, the temps are dropping again. So goes January in The Virginia Piedmont.

In the poem, The Wasteland, T.S. Eliot famously said “April is the cruelest month…”. I’m not smart enough to argue with ol’ T.S., so let’s just call January a challenging month and let it go at that. I don’t hate January, and I don’t hate winter. I enjoy our four seasons and have no plans for relocation to a warmer climate. Still, I’m ready for February’s arrival. Yes, it remains winter, but January will be over, and we’ll have Valentine’s Day on February 14th. The 14th is important for another reason as well. The National’s pitchers and catchers report that day, as sure a sign of spring’s approach as anything I know of, and certainly more reliable than a groundhog’s musings.

Enjoy the season as best you can, my friends.

Addendum:

  • * If interested, here’s a blog I previously published about Gloom Period at West Point. “The United States Military Academy at West Point can be a beautiful place, just not in the middle of winter. We called the time from January through early March, Gloom Period. It was a combination of the blahs, a lack of color, a lack of light, and coldness. There was a pervasive grayness to life […] Continue here – https://mnhallblog.wordpress.com/2018/01/21/gloom-period/

Tammy

Tammy

Recently, I stopped in at David’s Barbershop for a haircut. My usual barber wasn’t there and instead, Tammy cut my hair. We were making small talk, when I learned she was one of the original boat people* who escaped from Vietnam. She told a fascinating story filled with both sadness and hope.

You know what I mean by barbershop small talk with a new barber – the weather, what’s new in town, whether I was retired… When I asked where she was originally from, she said Ho Chi Minh City, but left as a young girl. I asked her if she was one of the boat people. She looked at me, nodded and started telling her story.

After the fall of Saigon (now Ho Chi Minh City) in 1975, things became tougher in what was then South Vietnam. The North Vietnamese were rooting out “problems” and people who were, perhaps, too close to the previous government in the South. Tammy’s extended family decided that in order to survive, they needed to leave Vietnam.

They considered going overland to Thailand but discarded the idea. The only practical way was via boat as many others were already doing. Tammy’s aunt, her father’s older sister, took on the task of organizing the escape for their family.

Eventually, she found a boat making the trip to the Philippines. The boat held 50 people total and they secured passage. They were told when and where to meet the boat and have the remaining necessary funds with them.

They Would Attempt to Cross the South China Sea, Heading for the Philippines.

On the appointed day, they arrived early at the location and the boat was waiting for them. They made their final payments and boarded. Her father suddenly remembered something he needed from their house. Tammy doesn’t remember exactly what it was, only that it was important. There was plenty of time, so he left the boat and told them he would be back soon.

Time passed. Her father didn’t return. More time passed and her father still hadn’t returned. Finally, it was time for the boat to leave. Tammy’s aunt tried persuading the captain to delay the departure, but it was to no avail and the ship departed. Tammy never saw her father again.

The journey was a perilous one, as they needed to cross the South China Sea to reach the Philippines. They didn’t encounter pirates on their trip, which was sometimes common, however they did face bad weather and rough seas and the ship became lost. Although the captain piloted them back on route, they spent six days without food or water, before eventually landing in the Philippines. 49 people departed Vietnam. Unlike many of the boats evacuating people, all 49 arrived alive at their destination. Her father would have been the 50th person.

A Boat Similar to the One Tammy and Her Family Used.

Her family spent one or two years in a refugee camp in the Philippines, before eventually relocating to the United States. There she would meet her husband, also a Vietnamese refuge. He became an electrical engineer and eventually worked for the United States government. They raised two sons, one of whom graduated from George Mason with a degree in Cybersecurity, and the other from Virginia Tech with a degree in Software Development.

Tammy finished cutting my hair and I thanked her for the haircut and for sharing her story. I’d gone to the barbershop for a haircut – I also left with a small history lesson.

Tammy.

While driving home, I thought about Tammy, her family and other Vietnamese who came to this country in the aftermath of the Vietnam War. Wikipedia tells us about 2 million people attempted to flee Vietnam by boat. Somewhere between 200,000 and 400,000 people died. Roughly 800,000 were successful in finding a new home. Over 400,000, including Tammy, eventually settled in the United States.

All they wanted was a bit of freedom and a better life than what they saw coming at home. They were willing to risk death or imprisonment. Tammy and her family achieved some version of their dream here in America, although at the price of losing her father. Since then, she has contributed to our country and her children will contribute to our future.

In many ways, her story isn’t so different from the indentured servants, the Puritans, the Irish, the Italians, the Eastern European Jews, the Mexicans or others who have emigrated to America over the course of our history. People left home, often at great peril, to flee persecution, or seek a better life or greater freedom. For many, upon reaching America there was a period of adjustment on their part, and resistance by those already here, before they too were accepted and became a part of the melting pot.

It is a story as old as America itself and regularly repeats over the decades and centuries of our history. Personally, I believe it builds up who we are as a country. They say the strongest steel is forged in the hottest fires. Thank heaven for Tammy and people like her who have faced great adversity and are now a part of America. We need them to continue strengthening the steel of this country.

Addendum:

  • Some older people may have forgotten the story of the Vietnamese Boat People, and those who are younger may have never heard about them. The short version of the story goes like this: the United States left Vietnam in 1973. In 1975 30 North Vietnamese divisions were involved in the fight to take South Vietnam. A great number of the troops defending South Vietnam were concerned about their own families and deserted. The North Vietnamese moved rapidly through South Vietnam and Saigon fell in April of 1975. After the fall, many South Vietnamese were in fear of their lives under the new government and fled, or tried to flee South Vietnam. This took place between 1975 and the early ‘90s, with the highest period of flight from ’78 – ‘79. While some travelled overland, trying to reach Thailand, most went by boat with destinations of Thailand, the Philippines, Malaysia, Hong Kong and Guam.
  • Thanks to my friend and West Point Classmate, Ken Bresnahan, for some assistance with this blog.

Mooseburgers

Mooseburgers

The last time I saw Tim, I was back in Ottawa for my Brother-in-Law Jack’s funeral. I didn’t know it would be the last time, although I suspected it might. Mark, Howard and I were invited to Tim and Renee’s home for a lunch of Mooseburgers, with Tim serving as grill master.

Cath and I had visited Tim and Renee a few weeks before, while in Ottawa for my 50th high school reunion. After flying into Chicago, we stopped by and spent a few hours at their place in St Charles. It was good to catch up. They were supposed to make the reunion as well, but couldn’t. At the time, Tim was a 4+ year pancreatic cancer survivor, but things were going downhill the last couple of months prior to the reunion.

When Jack died of brain cancer a couple of weeks later, I returned for his services and to see my sister Roberta. I called Tim and Renee to see if we might get together, and I think Tim came up with the idea of the group lunch. Old buddies, Mark and Howard were invited and both quickly said yes. The five of us met on the 14th of October.

Tim, Howard and I have known each other since before kindergarten. Mark came on the scene around 5th grade and we have all been buddies ever since. As to Renee, Tim and Renee met through Cath and I in the early ‘90s. What started as friendship turned into love, and they married.

Tim and Renee’s Wedding.

The lunch was a good time. Renee made some wonderful appetizers and our conversations were wide-ranging. Yes, we talked about Tim’s cancer, but we also talked about the Bears and the White Sox, and as is inevitable when together, retold stories from our youth and good times together over the years.

After a while, Tim shuffled out to the grill and cooked the Mooseburgers. They’d brought the ground moose back last summer from their annual vacation to their place in Maine. I believe a cousin shot the moose and gave them some of the burger. Renee let us know that although he was weaker, Tim insisted on cooking. The burgers were great, and cooked perfectly. There was more talk and Tim, his voice somewhat raspy, eventually grew tired. It was time to go. We hugged Renee, fist-bumped Tim and said our goodbyes and “I love you’s”. Mark drove north to Wisconsin, while Howard and I headed south. It was the last time all of us were together.

Mooseburgers

Tim and I continued to text almost daily after that. The last one from him was on November 8th, when he congratulated me on the Virginia election results. After that, the link went silent. Cath and I stayed in contact with Renee and others, and knew Tim’s condition was worsening. Late on the night of December 4th, Renee called and let us know Tim passed away. After talking a while longer, I sent our love her way and hung up the phone. I silently cried dry tears.

I’ve known Tim for about 65 of my 68 years. Tim…June…Junebug… There are so many stories. Although I know there are groans in some quarters when we re-tell them for the 1,000th time, they still bring a smile to my face. In my mind, rather than a film, I see thousands of snapshots of our times together. The number of actual photos is more limited. Unlike now, back in the day we didn’t have the technology, or the desire, to capture everything going on. I think our lives are a little richer for that.

The “snapshots” of those times blur together. Some of the memories are blurry as well, while others are crystal clear. They span two continents, several states and seven decades.

I can turn the kaleidoscope of those decades in my mind and several pictures emerge – earning my God And Country Scout award in ‘68 with Tim and Howard; Tim, Howard and Mark serving as groomsmen for Cathy’s and my wedding in ‘78; multiple visits by Tim and Howard to our home in Germany in the ‘80s; introducing Tim and Renee in the ‘90s and then they married; ski trips to West Virginia in the ‘90s and 2000s with Tim never leaving the cabin; wonderful Bordeaux Dinners at Tim and Renee’s home near Chicago in the 201Xs; all four couples together at Camp Kishauwa in ‘22.

Tim, Howard and I Receiving our God and Country Awards.

I turn the kaleidoscope a second time and different pictures emerge – in the 60s, Tim and I in Boy Scouts sharing a tent at Camp Kishauwa; the Ottawa Gluttons eating team at OHS in ‘73; shipping a keg of bier from Germany to Tim in Chicago in ‘86; visiting Tim and Howard at their iconic Chicago apartment on numerous occasions in the ‘90s; New Year’s Eve dinners at the farm with Tim and Renee in ‘99 and the 2000s; Cath and I visiting Tim and Renee’s beloved Maine for a vacation; endlessly talking and texting about politics and history during Covid.

At Howard and Tim’s Apartment in Chicago in the Early ‘90s.

I rotate the kaleidoscope again and more memories race through my mind – Mrs Finkeldye’s first grade class; drinking biers at the Butler’s House in our high school years; church youth fellowship; Tim saving me from the MPs in Germany; Tim sleeping on the couch with our dog, Top; Tim and Renee with Cath and I skinny dipping in Lost River; Tim and Renee at the Hash; Tim, Howard, Mark and I decades ago on a New Year’s Eve at 3AM in a picture forever frozen in time – all of us young, with our whole lives in front of us…

New Year’s Eve 1978.

There were no photos taken of us at the Mooseburger lunch. We didn’t need or want any. What I’ll remember is the fellowship and love of old friends spending a few hours together. I’ll always remember that lunch. Always. The memory of it will spark a kaleidoscope of images – an endless stream of snapshots in an infinite number of combinations.

Rest in peace Tim. I love you.

Addendum:

Here are some previous blogs featuring Tim:

Snow Satisfaction

Snow Satisfaction

In 1988, Cath and I enjoyed a ski vacation in the village of Ischgl, Austria, known for both its skiing, and its Après-ski activities. It also presented the opportunity to ski from Austria to Switzerland, as long as we brought our passports. As is usual, Cathy had the last word after we completed the run.

While stationed in Germany in the ‘80s, we took many ski vacations to Austria, sometimes for a long weekend, sometimes for a week. We often went with our friends Jim and Res to the Austrian town of Nauders on the Italian border. The skiing was great there and we enjoyed many fun trips with them.

Good Times With Jim and Res on One of Our Ski Trips.

In ‘88, Jim and Res couldn’t get away, so we decided to go on our own and try a new location. We eventually settled on Ischgl, a village in Austria’s Paznaun Valley with nearly 150 miles of groomed downhill trails. It’s also known as something of a party town with a multitude of Après-ski bars, clubs and restaurants.

We had a great time that week and the town lived up to both its ski and Après reputation. We would ski in the morning, have lunch and a bier at a restaurant on the mountainside, and then ski all afternoon. Eventually, we skied our way back to town and stopped at different places for a drink. Afterwards, we walked to our Gasthaus, cleaned up and went out for dinner, and maybe dancing later. Finally, we’d make it to bed, sleep like the dead, and then do the same thing the next day. It was wonderful, and an easy thing to do when in your early thirties.

Cathy Catching Some Rays on the Slope at Lunch One Day

We learned we could ski from Ischgl, across the border and into the duty-free town of Samnaun, Switzerland. As the crow flies, about 10 kilometers separate the two towns, but It’s farther when skiing. Looking at the map, the route was a combination of ski lifts and Blue and Red trails. (in Europe, Blue are considered easy and Red are intermediate trails). Although we didn’t need passports to enter Switzerland, we would need them to re-enter Austria. We decided to give it a go the next day and have lunch in Samnaun, before returning to Austria.

Ischgl on the Right. Samnaun on the Left.

It was a perfect day with a blue sky as we started towards Samnaun. Through a combination of skiing and a couple of chairlifts, we arrived at the red trail heading into Switzerland. As we descended, it was nice skiing, but then we came upon an icy, relatively steep cat-track, connecting on its far side to a steep descent to the village of Samnaun. Several people stopped there gathering their breath, before continuing. The mountain was on the right side of the track. On the left side, the ground dropped rapidly away into an unskiable valley. As we were watching, many people had problems on the ice and were falling, so some caution was warranted. We were about ready to go when someone came zooming down the slope from above, cut his skis into the snow and ice to turn onto the cat-track and… the skis didn’t grab the ice. Instead of turning, he shot off the side of the mountain, traveled through the air for about 40 feet, and then landed 20 feet below the trail in the snow. Hmmmm.

That caught our attention, particularly Cathy’s. The guy was OK, but now needed to find one of his skis and then climb back up the side of the valley to reach the trail. He couldn’t ski out from where he was.

We watched awhile longer, and then I said to Cath it was time to go. She disagreed and wanted to wait a little longer. More time went by and Cathy still wasn’t quite ready. Finally, I said something like “We can’t stay here, and we can’t go back up. The only way out is down the cat-track.” Eventually we started and slowly made our way. Cathy reverted to snow-plowing and her edges grabbed on the ice. After what seemed like forever, but in reality was probably two or three minutes, we made it past the cat-track. A few people were crashing and burning around us, but we had nary a fall. All that was left was the final descent.

We stood there congratulating ourselves and I pulled out my flask for us to share a short shot of brandy. I filled the cap about half full and handed it to Cathy. She looked in the cap and said, “Really? Do you think I could have a double?!” We both laughed and I filled the cap to the brim. She shot it down, handed it back, and took off on the final descent into Samnaun. After pouring myself a short one, I put away the flask and tore after her, eventually catching up. While the slope was a little steep, the snow was good and we arrived in town without mishap.

Cathy on the Slope.

We took off our skis and found a nice looking Gasthaus. I don’t remember what we ate, but the bier we drank with lunch tasted awfully good. After lingering a while and doing a little shopping, we took a cable car back up the mountain. Following a short ski, and then an additional chairlift ride further up, we arrived at the border crossing into Austria, where we dutifully presented our passports.

Once through customs, we skied down the slope into Austria. We made a couple more runs, and decided to call it quits. It had been a tiring day.

We skied into town to a bar/restaurant we discovered earlier in the week, and after stacking our skis outside, walked in. The place was quite crowded. We found a small table, settled in, and ordered biers along with a couple of Poire Williams*, a French eau de vie (we called them Poor Willies).

As we sipped our biers, the band began playing and their first song was The Stones’ “Satisfaction”. We, along with half the crowd, jumped on the dance floor and started dancing in our ski boots. As we were dancing, the crowd, a mishmash of Austrians, Germans, French, Dutch, Italians and others from who knows where, were all singing at the top of their lungs “I CAN’T GET SNOW… SATISFACTION!” It was one of those perfect moments you can never replicate, but forever remains clear as a bell in your mind’s eye. To this day, I feel my boots hitting the floor in time with the music, hear the crowd singing to “Satisfaction” and see the look of laughter and love in Cathy’s eyes.

Eventually it was time to leave. We went outside to find our skis and make our way home. As we were standing there, Cathy grabbed her crotch with one hand and started pulling at her clothes. I burst out laughing and said, “What the hell are you doing?!” She looked me straight in the eye and answered, “I am adjusting my balls. I kicked that slope’s ass today!” With that, my wife threw her skis over her shoulder and started walking home.

Addendum:

  • Poire Williams is the name of a French eau de vie (literal translation – “water of life”), a clear brandy made from pears. Poire is the French word for pear, while Williams is the type of pear. In Germany and Austria, they make an equivalent bottling called Williams Birne Schnaps. Both are strong, and nothing like the peppermint schnapps we know here in America. Depending on the quality, you might either sip or shoot it.

Sounds of Silence

Sounds of Silence

It was an early winter morning a little before sunrise – that liminal period of time between darkness and light. When I left the house to feed the horses, it was so quiet, the silence felt deafening. I soon discovered the opposite was true. In that cold predawn stillness, sound was everywhere, once I started listening.

That Liminal Period Between Darkness and Light.

I have to admit on most mornings, I’m on autopilot as I walk to the barn. Typically, I’ve only been up about ten or fifteen minutes and haven’t yet had my coffee. It’s pretty rote – walk to the barn, feed the cats, feed the horses and return to the house to make coffee.

I suppose I have the sudden snorting of a buck to thank for my change on this particular day. I stopped and tried to pinpoint his location in the paddock, but couldn’t see him. The question of whether he was sounding an alarm, or merely indicating curiosity was soon answered – I heard muffled footfalls, and then saw six deer leaping our fence before clamoring into a neighbor’s field. Our dog Carmen and I were both so startled, neither of us did anything except watch them go, their white tails vivid in the half-light. I have no idea why Carmen didn’t chase them – it was the first of three unusual non-actions on her part that morning.

The deer must have disturbed some nearby turkeys, as two of them started “gobbling” in the woods by the pond. I looked for them as well, but couldn’t tell if they were on the ground, or the low branches of a tree. Carmen, for the second time that morning, did nothing.

By now, my ears were evidently alert, as I heard a woodpecker tapping near the side of the house. A few footsteps later, the whinnies of our neighbors’ horses came from about 100 yards away. That was unusual for them at this time of the morning. Perhaps something was about, as they were joined by the barking of our friend’s dogs, Jonah and Jebson, about a quarter mile down Swains Road. Carmen’s ears pricked up. Much like the dog telegraph in the movie, 101 Dalmatians, the two frequently start a message that circulates among the other dogs in the neighborhood. This morning, Carmen must have decided they were just gossiping – after listening for a second, she trotted to the barn, with nary a bark.

Jonah and Jebson Trying to Look Innocent

It was chilly in the barn and there was a skim of ice on the water buckets. Our cats, Ollie and Mama Cat, stared silently at me, waiting for their breakfast. The horses weren’t so quiet. Stella and Katie nickered, snorted and pawed the ground. They too wanted their breakfast, but made a much bigger demonstration than the cats about it.

I fed the cats and then the horses, left the barn and started making my way back to the house. It was nearing sunrise now and there was some color in the eastern sky. Carmen and I stopped for a moment just outside the barn and looked to the east. We disturbed a couple of crows who scolded us with their caws, but the cardinals in the nearby evergreen didn’t seem to mind our presence and continued to sing their song of CHEER, CHEER, CHEER ,,, PRETTY, PRETTY ,, PRETTY, PRETTY!

Color and Light in the Eastern Sky.

I thought about the birds and animals, both tame and wild, who were there to greet Carmen and I that morning. It brought to mind one of my favorite quotes from Maya Angelou – “Listen to yourself and in that quietude you might hear the voice of God.” While watching the sun rise that morning, I had an additional thought – In the quietude of a winter’s morning, hear the voices of God’s creatures and feel blessed, for we are all God’s creatures.